Wednesday 12 February 2003
But how meaningless?
“When you simply want to veg,” says Loren Webster, “there’s not much better than a meaningless television program.”
And not just when you want to veg. When my ShopFast supermarket order was delivered just before midday, it occurred to me that instead of listening to music I could watch TV while I was putting away the groceries and packing the meat & fish in the freezer (I buy my fruit and veg from the local greengrocer). I never turn on the TV during the day so I checked the program:
12:00 Channel 10 Jerry Springer: Backstabbing Lovers Confess
I couldn’t resist.
The phone rang so I missed much of the first segment (a pregnant woman can’t be faithful to the father of her children) but caught the rest of the show whilst juggling groceries and dividing Reimi-chan’s “gourmet mince” into meal-size portions.
In the middle segment, two young women complain that their boyfriend can’t (or won’t) decide between them, then he waltzes out with girlfriend #3 who informs the others that “he really wants to be with me.” Recriminations and anguish follow.
The final segment was similar. Young man confesses to fiancée that he’s been seeing someone else. She goes ballistic (“But we’re getting married in six months!”). Girlfriend #2 comes out and, with much bleeping of the verbal exchange, the women are held apart by security guards. Eager to rub salt into the open wounds, Jerry prompts the young man to admit to both women that he’s been seeing a third person—who turns out to be a man! The men kiss passionately then sit next to each other holding hands while the women look like a pair of stunned mullet. The program concludes with audience questions and heckling followed by a sanctimonious mini-sermon from Springer.
So here are my questions (and pardon my naiveity but I don’t read the National Enquirer or People):
- Is this a thoroughly-rehearsed farce? Like professional wrestling?
- Are the guests paid for appearing?
- Is the need for attention or momentary notoriety so great that people agree to be humiliated on national (and international) television?
- Surely anyone who appears must know that they’ll be confronted with a bucketful of unpleasant truths—and lies?
I know there are some serious TV watchers amongst the visitors to my site and I eagerly anticipate your answers.
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There may be some serious TV watchers, but with a salespitch like that, how are you going to get them to admit it? ;)
I believe my wife may have watched the Springer show every now and then and I may have caught the odd glimpse.
But I don't think its scripted, rather as you say the need for attention outweighs the humiliation.
I must admit that once you have glanced over your beloved's shoulder at more than a couple of episodes it all gets rather repetitive. The only saving grace is guessing which surprise the next victim is going to be exposed to.
Take your pick from; I'm unfaithful, I'm unfaithful with a member of the opposite gender to you, I'm unfaithful with a number of different partners, the baby isn't yours or I don't want my son/daughter seeing that person.
Of course the on air weddings are the piece de resistance. But you will have to keep watching as they only turn up once every few months.
Now where did I put that David Attenborough tape ...
Springer has been documented to "script" the performances and to hire actors to play the parts on some, if not all, of his shows.
However, there are plenty of similar shows on the tube that do have some really strange people that are drawn from real life and are in similar situations as you saw.
In addition to scripted performances, there are people who answer those invitations to appear (you know, "if you are a grossly obese transvestite with a crack-whore mother, and are interested in being on the Springer show, please contact...") but who do not actually have the advertised pathologies--they do it on a lark. The Springer show rolls out the red carpet for the people who appear on the show--you stay at a nice hotel, get squired around in a limo, etc--so if you are willing to camp it up, it's a good deal. Some people have been on the show a number of times, with a different (apparent) pathology each time.
I like how the titles often animate in shows like that:
"My partner is SECRETLY [word sneaks in] a transvestite, but my MOM [word comes pounding down] wants us to BREAK [word literally breaks in two] up!"
It is so funny, so cliche.
Ever heard Weird Al's song "Jerry Springer"? It perfectly encapsulates the absurdity and addictiveness that is the JSS.
Man: Baby, I been sleeping with your sister.
Woman: Which one?
Man: All of 'em.
Woman: Well I been sleeping with your best friend Jake!
Man: Yeah? Well, well, me too! *And* I been sleeping with your dog Woofie!
Woofie: woof
Woman: Woofie, you b****! Well I'm also sleeping with your pet goat!
Goat: baaa
Man: That goat doesn't love you.
Whoa, Jonathon, I'm not sure I like even being mentioned in the same blog entry with Jerry Springer, though I'll have to admit that I've wondered the same thing the few times I've looked at it.
Judging from the number of ex-students who would do "anything" to get noticed by their peers, I suspect at least some of these guests are willing to appear just for their "five minutes" of fame.
I knew that amongst my erudite and discerning site visitors there would be some willing (honest? courageous?) to admit a healthy interest in popular culture.
Andy, the David Attenborough tape might be under that pile of Oprah magazines.
Larry, I don't suppose you could recommend any "real life" Springer alternatives. I'm sure we'd get them down here too.
Adam, your comment made me wonder what it would be like to have a Jerry Springer show in which the cast and audience were drawn entirely from the blogging population. Anyone on the Technorati Top 100 list would have to be an audience member so that undiscovered bloggers could get a chance to star.
Kris, they have those kinds of titles on Japanese chat shows too. They crack me up.
Laurabelle, thanks for that. A Google search turned up the complete lyrics for that song. What a hoot!
Loren, what can I say? Given that you've watched JS "a few times," would you consider writing a critique of the Weird Al song?
http://www.lyricsxp.com/lyrics/j/jerry_springer_weird_al.html
Jonathon, I've been hanging on "Sea Change" since my local PBS station started airing it. Does that count?
Sorry, Sea Change definitely doesn't count. And you won't believe this, Dorothea, but I shot stills on Sigrid Thornton's first feature film -- she was fourteen!
"...if you are a grossly obese transvestite with a crack-whore mother, and are interested in being on the Springer show, please contact..."
W00t! I'm *in*!
This discussion is now closed. My thanks to everyone who contributed.
© Copyright 2002-2003 Jonathon Delacour
There may be some serious TV watchers, but with a salespitch like that, how are you going to get them to admit it? ;)
Posted by: steve on 12 February 2003 at 11:23 PM